Common English Mistakes in Script Treatments by Cantonese Speakers

This page focuses on errors typically made by native Cantonese speakers from Hong Kong when writing a Script Treatment in English.

Mistake Example #1

Overuse of direct translations from Cantonese

In the bustling city of Hong Kong, the night market is like a dragon dance, fuilled ofwith colors and sounds. The protagonist, Mei, sheis a girl withthe heart of lion, always ready to help others. One day, she meets a mysterious old man who tells her, "If you want to find the treasure, you must first find the dragon's eye." SoMei, withand her friends, they embark on a journey that is like climbing a mountain, fullwith ofmany challenges and surprises.

Text corrected by:
Jennifer, Detroit, Michigan USA

"Very good! I just made some changes so the English would sound more natural."

In the bustling city of Hong Kong, the night market is like a dragon dance, filled with colors and sounds. The protagonist, Mei, is a girl with the heart of lion, always ready to help others. One day, she meets a mysterious old man who tells her, "If you want to find the treasure, you must first find the dragon's eye." So Mei and her friends embark on a journey that is like climbing a mountain, with many challenges and surprises.

In the bustling city of Hong Kong, the night market is like a dragon dance, full of colors and sounds. The protagonist, Mei, she is a girl with heart of lion, always ready to help others. One day, she meets a mysterious old man who tells her, "If you want to find the treasure, you must first find the dragon's eye." Mei, with her friends, they embark on a journey that is like climbing a mountain, full of challenges and surprises.

Mistake Example #2

Overuse of 'very' to emphasize adjectives

In the bustling city of Hong Kong, the streets are very crowded and verynoisy, filled withvery bright lights that make the night feel like day. Our protagonist, Mei, is a verytalented artist who dreams of creating avery beautiful mural that captures the very essence of her vibrant city. As she walks through the verynarrow alleys, she imagines thevery colorful scenes she will paint, hoping to bring a veryunique perspective to thevery busy lives of the people around her.

Text corrected by:
Michele A., Boston, Massachusetts; United States

"I reduced repetition of the word "very." Otherwise, the ideas in this text are clearly expressed."

In the bustling city of Hong Kong, the streets are very crowded and noisy, filled with bright lights that make the night feel like day. Our protagonist, Mei, is a talented artist who dreams of creating a beautiful mural that captures the very essence of her vibrant city. As she walks through the narrow alleys, she imagines the colorful scenes she will paint, hoping to bring a unique perspective to the busy lives of the people around her.

In the bustling city of Hong Kong, the streets are very crowded and very noisy, filled with very bright lights that make the night feel like day. Our protagonist, Mei, is a very talented artist who dreams of creating a very beautiful mural that captures the very essence of her vibrant city. As she walks through the very narrow alleys, she imagines the very colorful scenes she will paint, hoping to bring a very unique perspective to the very busy lives of the people around her.

Mistake Example #3

Confusion with countable vs. uncountable nouns ('She has much friends')

In the bustling streets of Hong Kong, Mei Ling dreams of becoming a famous film director. She has mucha lot of ambition and matonys of ideas, but she knowsthat making a movie requires amuchltitude of resources. Her story is about a young girl who discovers a secret world hidden beneath the city, a placewhere magic and reality blend together. Mei Ling believes that with enough determination and a large amouchnt of creativity, she can bring her vision to life and inspire macounytless audiences around the world.

Text corrected by:
Gregg, Los Angeles, CA

"This needed some tweaking for countable vs. uncountable nouns, among other fixes."

In the bustling streets of Hong Kong, Mei Ling dreams of becoming a famous film director. She has a lot of ambition and tons of ideas, but she knows making a movie requires a multitude of resources. Her story is about a young girl who discovers a secret world hidden beneath the city, a place where magic and reality blend together. Mei Ling believes that with enough determination and a large amount of creativity, she can bring her vision to life and inspire countless audiences around the world.

In the bustling streets of Hong Kong, Mei Ling dreams of becoming a famous film director. She has much ambition and many ideas, but she knows that making a movie requires much resources. Her story is about a young girl who discovers a secret world hidden beneath the city, where magic and reality blend together. Mei Ling believes that with enough determination and much creativity, she can bring her vision to life and inspire many audience around the world.