Common English Mistakes in Transfer Essays by German Speakers

This page focuses on errors typically made by native German speakers from Germany when writing a Transfer Essay in English.

Mistake Example #1

Incorrect word order in subordinate clauses

When I decided to transfer to your university, I considered how important it is for me, that Io study in an environment where I can grow academically and personally. The courses that your university offers, they align perfectly with my career goals, which I have set for myself. Andditionally, I believe that the diverse student community, it will provide me with opportunities to learn from different perspectives, which iswould be very valuable for my development.

Text corrected by:
Michele A., Boston, Massachusetts; United States

"I corrected some of the word order and usage to make the English sound more natural. Otherwise, the ideas in this text are clearly expressed."

When I decided to transfer to your university, I considered how important it is for me to study in an environment where I can grow academically and personally. The courses that your university offers align perfectly with my career goals, and I believe that the diverse student community will provide me with opportunities to learn from different perspectives, which would be very valuable for my development.

When I decided to transfer to your university, I considered how important it is for me, that I study in an environment where I can grow academically and personally. The courses that your university offers, they align perfectly with my career goals, which I have set for myself. Additionally, I believe that the diverse student community, it will provide me with opportunities to learn from different perspectives, which is very valuable for my development.

Mistake Example #2

Overuse of passive voice

WhenIwas in high school,I developed a strong interest in environmental science. wasI devsireloped by me. Tthe opportunity to study this subject in depthis desired by me, which is whyI am pursuing a transfer to your university. isI bering considered. Aa unique perspective on sustainability is brought by my background,andit is hoped tho matke valuable contributions to your programwill be made by me.

Text corrected by:
Camille, Maryland, USA

"Use active voice when possible. I've also made a few additional tweaks to the language to make it sound more native. "

In high school, I developed a strong interest in environmental science. I desire the opportunity to study this subject in depth, which is why I am pursuing a transfer to your university. I bring a unique perspective on sustainability and hope to make valuable contributions to your program.

When I was in high school, a strong interest in environmental science was developed by me. The opportunity to study this subject in depth is desired by me, which is why a transfer to your university is being considered. A unique perspective on sustainability is brought by my background, and it is hoped that valuable contributions to your program will be made by me.

Mistake Example #3

Capitalizing all nouns (following German grammar rules)

I am writing this Transfer Essay to explain my Rreasons for wanting to movtransfer to your esteemed Uuniversity. My current Uuniversity has provided me with a strong Ffoundation in the Ffield of Ccomputer Sscience, but I believe that your Iinstitution offers unique Oopportunities for Rresearch and Ddevelopment. I am particularly impressed by the innovative Pprojects and the diverse Sstudent Ccommunity that your Uuniversity fosters.

Text corrected by:
Michele A., Boston, Massachusetts; United States

"I changed the first letter of the common nouns from capital to lower case."

I am writing this essay to explain my reasons for wanting to transfer to your esteemed university. My current university has provided me with a strong foundation in the field of computer science, but I believe that your institution offers unique opportunities for research and development. I am particularly impressed by the innovative projects and the diverse student community that your university fosters.

I am writing this Transfer Essay to explain my Reasons for wanting to move to your esteemed University. My current University has provided me with a strong Foundation in the Field of Computer Science, but I believe that your Institution offers unique Opportunities for Research and Development. I am particularly impressed by the innovative Projects and the diverse Student Community that your University fosters.