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do you mind me asking? vs do you mind my asking?

'Do you mind me asking?' is more informal and is sometimes used in everyday conversations. 'Do you mind my asking?' is considered more formal and grammatically correct. The choice between them depends on the level of formality you want to convey.
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Explained by Jennifer
Editor at TextRanch

Last updated: January 19, 2025 • 7909 views

This phrase is correct and commonly used in informal conversations.

"do you mind me asking?"

This phrase is informal and commonly used in everyday conversations to ask if someone is bothered by a question you are about to ask.

Examples:

  • Do you mind me asking where you got that shirt?
  • Feb 17, 2020 ... Do you mind me asking you? Which I know sounds grammatically incorrect and dialectical. My question is, what is this form of phrasing called ...
  • May 25, 2019 ... Is "do you mind me asking you" grammatically correct? All related (50).
  • Mar 10, 2018 ... Should the correct response be "Do you mind my asking what exactly I missed?" or, "Do you mind me asking what exactly I missed?" Which one is ...
  • Aug 10, 2017 ... Is "do you mind me asking you" grammatically correct? Better grammar would be “Do you mind my asking you?” You're supposed to use a ...
  • Feb 7, 2007 ... Do you mind ME asking...? (No Gerund?) So my confusion arises from the different use of the pronoun as it seems that I have heard both. Both ...
  • In this lesson, you'll learn how to ask and answer "Do you mind me asking how old you are?" Visit EnglishClass101 and learn English fast with real lessons ...
  • Do you mind me asking who you use for your CRM? If it is Salesforce, I am assuming you pay an additional fee for HubSpot? Overall, yes - we want to capture ...
  • Do you mind me asking what you think the worst thing VILLAIN Strange has done? I got curious after that other ask. I really want to know how bad evil ...
  • Oct 24, 2024 ... Nikki Goldsmith (@nikkidrinkscraft). 1 Reply. 1 Like. Thank you babe! Do you mind me asking are you attaching a single link out to a product ...
  • Feb 25, 2018 ... witchytricks-art said: Dude, I love your art!! Do you mind me asking what your main brush settings are? Answer: these are m' main brushes ...

Alternatives:

  • Do you mind if I ask?

This phrase is correct and considered more formal than 'do you mind me asking?'

"do you mind my asking?"

This phrase is more formal and grammatically correct. It is suitable for situations where a higher level of formality is required.

Examples:

  • Do you mind my asking for your opinion on this matter?
  • Feb 17, 2020 ... I have seen some phrases specifically involving the word “my” + 'gerund' which I don't understand. E.g Do you mind my asking you?
  • Mar 10, 2018 ... B: "Oh, I didn't realize that. Do you mind my/me asking what exactly I missed?" Should the correct response be "Do you mind my asking what ...
  • May 25, 2019 ... As is the case with other answers, the appropriate way of asking it is, “Do you mind my asking you?” The interrogative sentence contains two ...
  • Feb 7, 2007 ... I have a question concerning famous English Gerund constructions. In my memory I came across the following: Do you mind MY asking.
  • Aug 10, 2017 ... Do you mind my asking who? You is the correct answer to the question. Thus, you should be the object not me.
  • Jan 18, 2006 ... Good afternoon, Is it the right of saying below? How old are you ? Do you mind my asking ? Thank you, Claude.
  • Dec 1, 2010 ... Do you mind my asking what your test result were? Unfortunately, my neuro is out of town so I won't be getting mine for a few weeks.
  • Sep 3, 2023 ... coffeecat1983 said: Do you mind my asking, how do you get such clean lines in your work? It's absolutely gorgeous! Answer: Uhhhh- It's hard ...
  • Jul 8, 2024 ... Sure I bet there's stuff to improve upon but you're doing great I think.Do you mind my asking how small you're able to pack this setup down ...
  • Sep 15, 2018 ... Can I ask you one more question? I've been hearing you native speakers say like "Do you mind me asking ~~?" Do you think "Do you mind my asking ...

Alternatives:

  • Do you mind if I ask?

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